Currently soaking in SZA’s new album and particularly enjoying the song ‘20 something’ because the lyrics speak to me so hard.
Hopin’ my 20 somethings won’t end
Hopin’ to keep the rest of my friends
Prayin’ the 20 somethings don’t kill me, don’t kill me.
I’m also channeling the big hair- you like?
I’m excited that my 20 somethings haven’t killed me and with not much longer to go I’m happy to report that I’ve survived with minor cuts and bruises. Every time I thought I wouldn’t survive guess which motherfucker got up to fight another day?
Every now and again shit comes to a head and I’m left feeling like my 20 somethings want to kill me. From failed romantic pursuits to not having a clue where my career is going the 20 somethings have been interesting!
I’ve often said on here that it’s not a race, you must live life at your own pace and make a conscious and deliberate effort to forget about the back-ground noise and live your best life possible.
I am embarking on my first ever solo trip in a couple of weeks and I’m so excited because it couldn’t have come at a better time. I’m a confident lass but I’m also well aware that I get a lot of my confidence from others- especially my friends from whom there is no shortage of affirmations that I’m an okay human being.
I’m excited to see out my 20s with a strong sense of self. I want to find confidence and stillness within myself. Confidence without a bottle of wine, confidence without my friends shouting ‘yassssss’, confidence without the props and the gimmicks.
The 20 somethings whilst often rife with uncertainty have taught me many valuable lessons like:
Friendships can and will end, let go, let people serve their purpose and go
Not everyone who blows your back out has to be your soul mate
Your parents are human, they fuck up all the time
Don’t let the anxiety of not having your shit together lead you into making hasty decisions
You will always find people who fuck with your energy.
I am extremely grateful that my 20 somethings have not killed me or broken me. I am enthusiastic about the next chapters.
The bad days are a given- part of life, the way it is- Keep going.