Relentless, Radical, Unwavering self-love has become my motto for 2017. And whilst chanting that on the tube home every evening has started to do wonders for my spirit there are days when I absolutely cannot stand my in grown hairs, my round head or my FUPA, albeit small, but very much there. There are days when I trawl through pictures of beautiful women and then look at myself in the mirror and think ‘sissssssss get it together’.
When self-doubt tries to make an appearance my go to is thinking about all the other things that make me wonderful. Yes, I’m the ingrown hairs girl, the sometimes carrying more fat than I maybe should girl, the over the top loud ass girl but I’m also the kind girl, the smart girl, the motivating girl, the beautiful girl, the fun girl and the funny girl.
I’ve said many times on here that it must be a combination of age and changing the things that I see that have caused a shift in how I feel and interact with others. The shame and regret I used to carry around about absolutely everything from my grades to jobs to relationship to my weight almost no longer haunt me. It’s like I was carrying around all this baggage, got tired of the shit and set it on the side of the road and kept walking without a second glance.
It’s my life, it’s my rules. We get so bogged down with fitting in the mould society, our parents and everyone else has set for us, we lose sight of every other amazing thing about us. Every part of you is special, deserves love, deserves respect. You deserve respect.
Aggressive and relentless self-love means that I’m happy with my choices and I’m happy with the lessons and blessings that they come with. An extra ten percent body fat? I’ll take it, a week of running and cycling because I feel like it? – I’ll take it. Missing the gym so I can get my eyebrows done and cook a pot of stew- I will bloody take it!
Nobody can be you, and that in itself is a glorious glorious thing. When you’re 124 weeks deep into your favourite insta booty model’s Instagram remember that you only get to see everyone’s highlight reel and not their behind the scenes. Your thick things -your rules, your lazy eye- your rules, your back fat- your rules, your impossibly long arms- your rules, that laugh that sounds like an HP laptop overheating- you guessed it – your bloody rules.
Relentless, Radical, Unwavering self-love always. Namaste.